Don't hang on to it. Just go where it takes you. Don't try to control it.
The Universe just spent 13.8 billion years creating you. There's nothing you can do to try to fight it. It's a tidal wave of atoms.
Just do the best you can each day. If you don't know what that means, you have to figure that out for yourself.
If anybody tells you what it means, then they don't know what it means.